First Bar-B-Q in Kyrg...Shenanigans...Forever!

BBQMAN · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

Let's all sing along with Jeff (To a Lee Greenwood classic):

"And I'm proud to be a Canadian, because at least I know I'm free....................................."
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Jarhead · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

JAllen · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

Jarhead · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

1buckie · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

Kris does it good, Grateful Dead, even better...
~~~>K
JAllen, have things calmed down on the other side of the planet ??
PS: Got your shirts ready to go!~~~~>

JAllen · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

1buckie · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

You gots the PERFECT attitude for that place !!!
~~~~~~~~~>Ken

1buckie · Posted: Jul 23 2011 Post subject:

PS:
"Lots of old and new customers cleaning out our kitchen."

They're in the kitchen, cleaning?
Who sez you can't get good help in Bishkek !!!
Some kind of a new "will work for food" program you have going??
~>K

JAllen · Posted: Jul 25 2011 Post subject:

rewind to Sat 10pm.

Everything is going great. Great week; great Saturday.

Good music.

Remember I told you about those big Russian guys that came in looking for a scrimmage line?

Well, Kosta is one of them. He's about 6'8". He comes in with a normal-sized friend about 2pm. They're eating.

And they are drinking up a storm. Margaritas.

So many margaritas that my arms were getting tired of the shaking, and some of the last lime juice that's to be had in Bishkek is running low.

I'm not kidding you, they went through almost a litre of tequila but were sitting at table seven enjoying the ritas like a coupla Americans in Ensenada.

Well, ten pm comes and I'm ready to belt out some good blues and I go over to the makeshift stage and wait for Baha, the drummer to tap out the time on his sticks and we slide into a slow version of Tin Pan Alley and my guitar is a whining away and I'm getting that chilly feeling...

And then Julia, the waitress runs in the front door and comes over to me and says, "urgent!"

(I'm right in the middle of verse number two and there is nothing so urgent that I gotta stop playin, so I just keep right on smiling at her."

She leaves back out the front door.

Come to find out about 20 minutes later when the song ended, Kosta was in the downstairs bathroom relieving himself of some margaritas when he fell onto the entire toilet, breaking it off of the floor.

Water was gushing and people were running hither and thither and...

and I was upstairs playing....

"Lord, they're living for the wiskey, wine and giiiin."

And then Kostya's friend decided he was drunk enough to go wandering around our kitchen.

Gets thrown out, but he's a strong little tike and lops on to the bar with his mitts and the guard can't get him un-stuck.

It finally takes Kostya, all bloodied on his hands and his mouth from the fall onto the commode to get his friend on his way outside.

The last I saw was Kostya on his way out with his friend's arm around his neck and Kostya's arm around his friend's waist and his friend's feet one foot off the floor leaving the bbq joint.

Kostya, despite being drunk and damaged himself left 100 dollars for the toilet repair. He was really sorry about falling onto it.
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ecocks · Posted: Jul 25 2011 Post subject:

Gotta appreciate customers who pay $100 down and don't blow you off with a "let me know what the bill is" line.

Another night in the barbaricum draws to a close.....

JAllen · Posted: Jul 26 2011 Post subject:

Tuesday, July 26

New week.

Igor the guitar player has been repairing his apartment next door, so he told me last week he wanted to invite the three workers to our place for some bbq.

He's a good friend so I told him I'd give him a fat discount.

Well, the repairs took longer than expect, and his birthday is coming up, so he decided to have his birthday party here on Saturday and there would now be about fifteen people.

No sweat, but I asked him to come by today and put in an order so we can buy the meat and be ready for him plus whoever might come on Saturday.

Last Saturday a nice, travel-ragged Peace Corps upper brass guy came in with their training person and a couple nice ladies. They raved about the food and said they might want to do some seminars here. They said they'd definitely recommend us to the volunteers and put our menu up on the volunteers' billboard.

Other than that, I'm in here this morning, sore from the meat haul from the bazaar and belting out some loud tunes into the hall.

"Travelin" - JAllen

I'd been travelin too long
my boots were worn thin.
And I never imagined she'd invite me in.

I'd been on the road now
about six weeks.
And I never imagined a woman-
could be so sweet.

etc.
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JAllen · Posted: Jul 26 2011 Post subject:

JAllen · Posted: Jul 26 2011 Post subject:

dup edit.
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daddywoofdawg · Posted: Jul 26 2011 Post subject:

And where was he when the brawl went down?LOL!He sounds like the size and type, That if i was drunk I could easily see it his way.
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JAllen · Posted: Jul 27 2011 Post subject:

JAllen · Posted: Jul 27 2011 Post subject:

Wednesday and so far we're off to an okay start this week. Our pork supplier has crapped out as the Kazakhs have been taking massive loads of pork north of the border.

So now I'm training a new pork supplier to not give us rib racks in the shape of a triangle.

Yes, we were getting triangle-shaped ribs.

Add to that the price of pork is up 15 percent this month and beef and lamb are rising as well as the Pakistanis are shipping wagons of the stuff south.

And Uncle Sam's chicken quarters, known here as "Bush's legs" are also up 15%.

Mrs. JAllen makes some killer deserts and we've been selling them like hotcakes.
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RodinBangkok · Posted: Jul 27 2011 Post subject:

Over the years I've heard all the reasons why food prices go up, bottom line is they will rise with the market pretty much world wide. Only exception is subsidised pricing in some countries.
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JAllen · Posted: Jul 28 2011 Post subject:

Flashback to Tuesday.

Tuesday about 2pm in walks a squirrely Russian guy with a buzzcut. He's got a faded tattoo of blue and red something or other from his wrist up to his shoulder. And orders a Russian bloody-Mary. (That is a shot of vodka and a glass of tomato juice around here)

His name's Zhenya.

He orders another shot and he's looking a bit nervous and jabbering up a storm.

Come to find out his wife is in the maternity hospital fifty yards up the road. She's seven months pregnant and started having contractions.

One more shot sans tomato and he heads back.

Wednesday lunchtime and he comes back. It's not happening.

Another shot, "for energy," he says.

More nervous, Understandable, and he runs back out.

He comes back at 4. "They're getting ready to give her a shot so that she will deliver within the hour, and I'm gonna be in the delivery room."

me: "Okay, Zhenya, here's what you do...it's hot outside and your wife is gonna be hot (in that hospital). Here, take this ice and she'll be wanting to eat it during the delivery. Make some cool rags for her forehead. It will make her more comfortable.

I was speaking from experience. He took the ice.

He comes back in the evening, understandably very, very stressed. "It's still not happening, so they're gonna do a c-section." Another shot.

He comes in at 10pm looking pretty happy.

"I have a baby boy! They'll be waking my wife up tomorrow at 630am."

Well, we all breathed a collective sigh and we're looking for good news when he comes in today.
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JAllen · Posted: Jul 29 2011 Post subject:

Friday 630 am.

I make an early run to the joint to check the guard, the night bargirl and get a jump on anyone trying to buy pork.

Hear that giant sucking sound? The pigs are literally being sucked out of this country by the Kazakhs.

When we opened, I expected only about 15% max pork to be sold as this is a muslim country. We're selling 60% pork ribs and pp now.

1030am Well, my trip to the bazaar was successful. Ordered more ribs and butts than I can carry, hoping we have a good Friday/Saturday, building on last week's reasonably good sales.

The downside is we've added two more waiters, Max and Tim. They're both just out of school and never waited before, but they seem to be trying. This is an extra expense, and it's on top of the band that plays three nights a week.

Worst of all, in August our two interns will be finishing their internship, so if we keep them we'll be paying them.

Expenses piling up right along with sales growth.

We're working just to pay rent, repairs and everyone else, and I'm wondering how long this will continue to be fun.
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